Growing Capitalist, Or Not

SPRRC. My boys are learning this in school: Be Safe, Peaceful, Respectful, Responsible, and Cooperative. 

What they don’t teach is that they don’t need to have someone buy them every toy in the world. They also don’t teach that while it might be fun to run around in gym class to a popular song from the radio, in real life, that person is crazy and we really don’t want to get too excited or obsessed with knowing every detail about their life. While we’re at it, they don’t teach any foreign languages either, but that is a different post entirely.

This is where being a parent gets hard. They’re called values. Teaching your kids things that run counterculture is, well, like swimming upstream. More like swimming up Niagara Falls. Basically, a never-ending battle. 

Sure, I want to spoil my kids to death. I want them to have nice things. I want this to somehow make up for not seeing their dad very often or living in a small apartment or me having to work so much. They are great and they deserve everything. I’ve come to think, though, that they know this and take advantage. Or that kids are born with the “greedy gene.” I don’t know, but it makes things unbearable. The truth is that they have a room full of toys, and they’d rather play outside with sticks. But at the mention of giving something away or not buying anything new, the world comes crashing down. 

We don’t even own a television, mind you, so where is this coming from? Has a doctor somewhere actually identified a gene? No. It’s other people’s televisions. It’s billboards. It’s cereal boxes. It’s Target. It’s sneakers, t-shirts and backpacks. 

I certainly can’t keep them at home in the dark. I can’t make them walk around with their hands over their eyes. So how do you teach them to value something other than stuff when everything they see around them tells them they need something new, something else, something more? 

Well, we have started by volunteering as a family to serve food for the homeless on holidays. My parents always invited people into our home who didn’t have family to be with for the holidays and it is one thing that has certainly shaped my attitude toward community involvement. Help other people. Even though you may not have a lot to give. They appreciate it. They boys loved the experience. Has it put a damper on the begging and pleading? Not yet. But they’re young. 

I have also started gearing gifts or special recognition toward outings and activities rather than things. This has also been a little rocky―fun, free places have gift shops―who wants to be the bad guy all the time? But in those moments, it is as much about reminding myself as it is them. 

We are due for a new volunteer project, and of course, Christmas is around the corner so the boys are making their lists, very, very long lists. Part of me hopes I’m raising little "Occupiers," but best case scenario, they learn eventually to buy used cars instead of brand new ones. Fingers crossed.